So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
