Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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