Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
