why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
