I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
