But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize