roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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