Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
