That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize