:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
