But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
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