I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize