What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
