Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
