I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
