She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
