Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(256): View more from Alabama

FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex

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(318): View more from Louisiana

I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.

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(731): View more from Tennessee

What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(250): View more from British Columbia

Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.

(1-504): View more from Louisiana

Oh shit. This is getting real.

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(718): View more from New York

I can see the future and your future is full of penis

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(614): View more from Ohio

I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.

(330): View more from Ohio

THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"

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