Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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