i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
