So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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