I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
