Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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