i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
