Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize