we're chasing vodka with high fives
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize