you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
