Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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