so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize