jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
