That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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