So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
