The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
