You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
