Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Also, beer. Big fan.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
