She's JV to your varsity
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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