What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
