you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
