i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
