Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
