HIV tests are more positive than that guy
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
