Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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