im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
There are leaves in my underwear?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
