We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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