i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
