**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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