Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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