If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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