Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
