WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
