i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
