No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Randomize
